Making the Tough Decisions - Part 3

I have been discussing making the tough decisions to confront improper motives. So far we've dealt with the "Good Ole Boy" and the effect they can have on a church.
2. The Critical Spirit - Unfortunately these people don't introduce themselves by saying let me be critical for a second and then rant and rave for 20 minutes(that would actually be a better way to handle it). Many times they mask their criticism in comments or hints that further their own agenda, but appear to make them seem like they have genuine concerns about the church or people within it. For instance...I had a lady who was a youth worker at the time talk to me about how she wanted to see our students grow more in their faith. She believed God had so much for them and wanted to help out in anyway possible. Well Duh...All youth workers should feel that way. What she was really saying and you have to trust me when I say it all came out in the wash is that she didn't think the church or myself was doing enough to "disciple" students. Here is rundown of the events that followed. She and I met about possible scenarios to "do a better job." Unfortunately when it was all said and done I refused to let her daughter lead a Bible study under my authority because of her rebellion and promiscuous relationship she had just been involved in. I was to blame apparently for her daughter's poor choices and now that she had attempted to get her life back on track, she was to be the spiritual hero(not on my watch). This led to a downward spiral of gossip about the ministry, that was still masked in spirituality. When I finally hit it head on, which was about two weeks too late, I was told, and I quote "you are not a pastor, you are an evangelist"(whatever that means). She went on to say "If you were, you would leave the 99 and go after the one" which was her daughter that was angry with me. I gently(ok not really) looked her in the eye and said to her that in order for me to leave the 99 and go after her daughter, she must first be willing to admit to me that her daughter was lost(because that is the premise behind that parable), and if that is the case, what the heck are you doing asking if she can lead a Bible study. Deal with the firmly, and deal with them quickly, because their mask of spirituality can lead many others astray and you will have clean up work to do.